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You would think being the coach who led the UConn women’s basketball team to 11 national championships would make Geno Auriemma at peace with himself and pretty laid back about his outlandish success.
But I found out last night this guy is probably the most complicated and conflicted super-successful person in college basketball.
Geno’s crazy competitive yet knows that winning doesn’t necessarily make him happy. He likes coaching his players but is open about “hating” so much about his job such as being in demand for interviews and people always wanting to talk to him.
He feels being successful isn’t as great as we all think it would be. It’s a hassle. He can’t go out and just meet for a beer with his friends because he’ll get mauled by autograph seekers. Being famous, he says, isn’t all that much fun. We all think we want to be famous, but if we become that it’s just not nearly as pleasant a life as we imagine it would be. After he wins a national title, he says the joy only lasts for a brief time, then it’s on to the next goal. The journey to winning beats how you feel after winning.
He says things that surprise you. When his team was on a run of more than 100 straight wins, he said he’d wake up in the morning and hope his team would lose because he thought that would be better for the team. And yet, of course, Geno can’t stand losing.
This man is a crescendo of emotional and rational contradictions. Warm and charming on the one hand, tough, critical, and highly opinionated on the other hand. Mean sometimes to players, belittling sometimes, unrelenting.
Still, when he talks you can’t stop listening because his insights are so raw, insightful, and intense. He thinks about life and what it all means. Geno knows he overanalyzes things, has shortcomings, and admits he is having more difficulty these days dealing with his players because they’re not as wedded to what he says as they once were. They take from him what they want, and feel entitled to their scholarships and playing time, but have others they turn to for advice more so than earlier in his career. He is not in total control of their basketball careers the way he once was.
He’s also into body language big time. If a player on his team riding the bench has bad body language, he says they’ll never get into the game — never. He demands his players are enthusiastic and have great attitudes.
He possesses what the best coaches all have. The ability when he speaks to get players’ attention because he communicates with sharp clarity and conviction and much of what he says makes sense. It’s real. It’s often rough.
But you can’t help but tune into his words because he’s just so smart and wise and knows what words to use to make you understand what he’s dead set on letting you know. A rare gift he has – getting people to listen to what he says. There are many reasons he’s the greatest coach in women’s college basketball and I believe the most important reason is the way he speaks. It’s mesmerizing and so honest and real that you just have to listen.
Geno is approaching the end of his coaching career. I got the feeling listening to the interviews he’s had about enough of the new world of college sports in which his players feel entitled more than they used to be. He could be a preacher or a corporation leader who goes around the world giving spellbinding speeches on leadership and life lessons.
This is not a guy who has to put up with anything he doesn’t enjoy anymore.
And yet he tells the story that he was recently in his car on a recruiting trip in some nowhere place on his way to a high school to see a player he’s interested in joining his team. He asks himself: “What am I doing? I could be on a golf course like most friends my age.”
Yet he goes to the game, he says and sees the player.
“It’s like a drug, I guess,” he says.
Maybe he’ll never stop coaching. Maybe he’ll retire today.
The only thing we know for sure is he’ll be conflicted.
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Sammy Sportface, a sports blogger, galvanizes, inspires, and amuses The Baby Boomer Brotherhood. And you can learn about his vision and join this group's Facebook page here:
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