Feeling more popular, strut-worthy, and in demand than ever, Sammy Sportface was surprised to find out that all the homeboys he invited to hang out with him this morning at the Tastee Diner in Bethesda, Maryland for breakfast had scattered out of town to various far-flung and random destinations, supposedly.
Sportface felt stunned to have been jilted by his boys now that he’s drenched in new money tied to the flood of new Facebook follower requests to his Baby Boomer Brotherhood Blog.
Listen to these excuses. Bert claimed he was going to Portugal. Z made up some BS about going to Charlottesville. Spoog lied about going to Middleburg – wherever that is – for a long weekend.
Being supremely self-aware, Sportface surmised the fellas made up these excuses because they needed a weekend devoid of Sportface, who text bombs the three of them and dozens of others seven days a week before 7 a.m. with blogs about Wake Forest football they don’t want and never asked for.
Rebuffed but undeterred, Sportface called an audible. He text-bombed Bullet, Head, Wolfford, Qweenie, Rudy, Foghorn, Gil, Moose, Meathead, Dankos, Walls, Fabless, Chew, Bunkie, Flash, Snorty, and Rooster, asking all of them to meet him at the Tastee Diner for waffles and French Toast this morning at 6 am sharp.
No one responded.
This made Sammy Sportface suspicious.
Could it be that Sportface isn’t as charismatic as he thinks he is? Is it possible his friends never open his text bomb attachments and wish he would stop bothering them?
By scattering from Sportface in droves, could this be a not-so-subtle message to the sports blogging braggadocio that he’s not having the galvanizing effect on his Facebook Followers that he believes he is?
Has Sammy Sportface been kidding himself about his influence all this time and no one has had the courage to tell him that this mission isn’t resonating with anyone and, in the words of Whit, needs to “shut down” the Sammy Sportface enterprise?
Feeling contemplative, sheepish, and hungry, Sportface went to the Tastee Diner this morning and ordered two waffles, a large chocolate milkshake, four plates of bacon, and two other plates of bacon. And had a milkshake for dessert.
“I’ll show the fellas,” said Sportface under his breath. “Sportface will shake up the world.”
Sammy Sportface, a sports blogger, galvanizes, inspires, and amuses The Baby Boomer Brotherhood. And you can learn about his vision and join this group's Facebook page here:
Sammy Sportface Has a Vision -- Check It Out
Sammy Sportface -- The Baby Boomer Brotherhood Blog -- Facebook Page
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