Skip to content
June 25, 2022
Trending Tags
sports news sports blog slider ticker football baseball ACC Basketball
  • NGSC Sports
  • Advertise with NGSC Sports for as little as $150 per month
NGSC Sports

NGSC Sports

  • NGSC Sports
    • NFL
    • NCAAF
    • NBA
    • NCAAB
    • MLB
  • Bonus
    • Permanent Guest Post
  • The Hub
  • Advertise

 
  • Home
  • 2020
  • July
  • 20
  • Sportface Shares Ways to Prepare for Booze Crooze Tooze
Read Time:2 Minute, 8 Second
  • Bonus

Sportface Shares Ways to Prepare for Booze Crooze Tooze

On July 20, 2020August 20, 2020
Sammy Sportface
Share

You need to get ready now for Booze Crooze Tooze on August 1st in the sewage known as Bethany Beach Bay. I have a few recommendations that will get you into the proper physical shape and focused psychological mindset.

First: Get a colonoscopy. Fill your milk carton with barium. Chug it down for 24 hours. Feel gravity pull it through your trachea and esophagus, down through your breastplate, into your large and small intestines. Feel the barium descend through you like a gumball in one of those circular spiraling-down gumball machines.

The next day, go to your doctor’s office, turn on your side, and insist on being shot up with a potent drug. Next thing you know you will be in a room with several strangers lying down in close quarters. Health professionals will ask you to pass gas.

Let it all go.

Cleaning out your colon will prime your insides for whatever you may ingest during Booze Crooze Tooze such as horseshoe crabs, seaweed, raw oysters, and undercooked hamburgers from raunchy tiki bars.

Second: Get a liver transplant. The liver you’re living with now is atrophied and beyond repair. You’ve abused it for decades. It wants out. So let it out. You need a new organ in there to process the orange crushes and Coronas with limes you will be guzzling on August 1st.

Third: Call, text, Instagram, YouTube, and email Frank Ryan. Get him engaged with the idea of helping the fellas make this Booze Crooze Tooze even more emotionally and physically toxic than the first one. We need fresh stories, a guy who can spin a yarn like no one else. 

Frank’s the guy. 

Without him, we’ll be telling the same stories as we have every time we’ve gotten together the past forty-five years. It’s a tired routine. 

Once you lure in Frank, assign him to recruit the rest of the HR State All-Time First Teamers:  John Wack, Billy Silk, and Michael McLaughlin. Zmuda’s not a First-Teamer but he’s already RSVPed yes so we can’t uninvite him.

Fourth: Recruit your favorite Georgetown Prep buddies to join us. Mine are Snake Leasure, Henny Hennigan, Spoog, and Vinny Scanlon. They own bigger boats than us so make sure they tow them to the marina so we can dirty up their property. Then disembark at the end of the brothel to head over Head’s house for barbecue ribs. Ditch the rich boys to clean their boats while we party on without them.

Share

Facebook
Twitter
Pinterest
LinkedIn

About Post Author

Sammy Sportface

Sammy Sportface, a sports blogger, galvanizes, inspires, and amuses The Baby Boomer Brotherhood. And you can learn about his vision and join this group's Facebook page here: Sammy Sportface Has a Vision -- Check It Out Sammy Sportface -- The Baby Boomer Brotherhood Blog -- Facebook Page
[email protected]
http://ngscsports.com
Happy
Happy
0 0 %
Sad
Sad
0 0 %
Excited
Excited
0 0 %
Sleepy
Sleepy
0 0 %
Angry
Angry
0 0 %
Surprise
Surprise
0 0 %

Author Profile

Sammy Sportface
Sammy Sportface
Sammy Sportface, a sports blogger, galvanizes, inspires, and amuses The Baby Boomer Brotherhood. And you can learn about his vision and join this group's Facebook page here:

Sammy Sportface Has a Vision -- Check It Out

Sammy Sportface -- The Baby Boomer Brotherhood Blog -- Facebook Page
Latest entries
  • MickelsonBonus2022.06.13Is Mickelson as Big a Fraud as Tiger?
  • NBABonus2022.06.12NBA: Playing Rarified Team Ball, Celtics Will Win the Title
  • GraduationBonus2022.06.02At Long-Awaited Graduation, Middlebury Class of 2020 Says Hello and Goodbye
  • GraduationBonus2022.05.20Graduation Speaker Nails It: Read Books and Make Babies
In BonusIn halfway hilarity , sammy sportface , slider , sports blog , sports blogs , sports news

Post navigation

Dynamo fall 2-1 to Portland Timbers in MLS is Back Tournament
MLB Weekly Digest July 20th Edition: Toronto Blue Jays Denied Approval to Host Games in Canada

Average Rating

5 Star
0%
4 Star
0%
3 Star
0%
2 Star
0%
1 Star
0%
(Add your review)

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Like Us On Facebook

Facebook Pagelike Widget

NGSC Sports on Twitter

Tweets by @@NGSCSports

You May Like

Read Time:4 Minute, 33 Second
  • Bonus
Sammy Sportface
On April 27, 2020August 20, 2020

Brady’s Letter to Belichick Reveals Real Reasons He Left Patriots

Read Time:2 Minute, 49 Second
  • Bonus
  • College Baseball
John Doucette
On April 2, 2020August 20, 2020

NCAA gives baseball players an extra year of eligibility

Read Time:4 Minute, 21 Second
  • Bonus
Sammy Sportface
On June 20, 2021June 20, 2021

High School Hoops Stand-Out Leading U.S. Open

Read Time:2 Minute, 17 Second
  • Bonus
  • Soccer
James Kahla
On July 24, 2018August 20, 2020

Preview: Houston Dynamo vs. Philadelphia Union

Read Time:1 Minute, 53 Second
  • ACC
  • Bonus
  • College Baseball
BC Communications
On March 31, 2021March 31, 2021

Boston College Baseball Shut Out at Connecticut, 12-0

Read Time:6 Minute, 23 Second
  • Bonus
Sammy Sportface
On January 20, 2021January 20, 2021

Swimming in Shame: Is Keller, Lochte or Phelps Most to Blame?

Copyright All right reserved | Theme: Telegram by Themeinwp