You no doubt still have in your head the image of Luca Doncic’s mom swimming around in the water of all the Disney Land rides as the NBA players enjoyed their visit to the famous resort. This story became about something much more provocative than basketball games in a bubble. We give you Silver’s tweet.
Everybody was having an agreeable moment. Because of this added attraction, NBA players had stopped bickering about whether to have the playoffs in Orlando.
Everything was set. Game on.
Not so fast. Game off.
NBA waters have turned tumultuous once again.
Minutes after the agreement, the Association’s Commissioner Adam Silver rocked the entire boat by posting a Tweet that got him in trouble with his wife and called into question his business judgment: “Luca’s Mom is the bomb. Can’t wait to visit Disney Land and see her swimming around.” #bikini #LittleMermaid #nice
His wife ordered bald-headed Adam Gold Silver and Bronze to take the Tweet down. Facebook marked the Tweet as “inappropriate” and “dangerous public discourse.”
Silver thought about shaving his head so no one would notice him, but he’s already as bald as a cucumber.
Making this story more salacious, the President of Disney Land, Walt Disney, posted pictures of Luca’s Mom in a toboggan on the flume ride on his Facebook page which has 795,439,789,569 followers.
It was all getting out of hand. The NBA season was up in the air once again.
“Stupid ass, Silver,” posted LeBron in a Tweet. “We had a deal and everything was set. Why did you have to blow it all by posting a gushing Tweet about Luca’s Mom? Can’t you control yourself? #libido #dirtyoldman
Silver’s job is in jeopardy. One Tweet may have ruined his reputation and lost the NBA hundreds of millions of dollars because the playoffs may not happen.
He’s especially distraught because he went the extra mile to ensure the NBA players would be treated like royal kings in Disney Land. All of them would be able to get daily pedicures and medicures, eat steak and lobster, play ping pong on smooth tables, go to exclusive movie theaters, and visit Disney Land every day to look at Luca’s Mom.
I had this whole thing wired and ready to go, he thought to himself while on his beachfront mansion on Fire Island, New York. But one simple Tweet has me on the verge of losing my super high paying job to run a basketball league.
He remembers reading Sammy Sportface blogs a while back about all the troubles NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell got into on that infamous cross-America road trip with Bill Belch and Robert Kraft to try to convince Tom Brady to play quarterback for the Patriots one more season.
Goodell found himself in the car when they picked up former-NFL-running back-turned-pothead-Ricky Williams on the side of the interstate in Idaho.
Ricky rolled a joint for the four men who were bored with the thousands of miles of driving and stressed out about the pandemic that had just hit. The whole thing felt apocalyptic so people were doing things out of character and professional risky to their personal brands.
“Hey Roger, it’s Adam Silver,” said Silver on his iPhone. “I’m sure you’ve heard about my Tweet about Luca Doncic’s mother.”
“Heard about it?” asked Roger rhetorically. “Twitterverse has blown up about it. You’re the biggest sports story in America. I can understand you thinking what you Tweeted about regarding Luca’s Mom. But you didn’t have to go Tweet about it.”
“I know. But I was just so excited because all the NBA players had finally agreed to participate in a playoff program held in Disney World. My emotions and passions and adoration for Luca’s Mom got the best of me.”
“It happens to many of us, even rich guys like us who are supposed to have sound judgment and self-control,” said Goodell. “I knew it was bad for my image to smoke weed with Ricky Williams and then go to a Daytona Beach Nightclub with Brady, Ricky, and Antonio Brown. But I just did it. We’re all humans after all.”
“What should I do? My family life is in jeopardy. Everybody is saying I need to step down.”
“Is Luca’s Mom married?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Then why don’t you just resign, take her to Disney World, and forget the NBA season?”
To be continued…