It all happened one year ago in a blurred state of mind as the sun went down over the horizon in Bethany Beach.
Capital Ahab Whit pulled into the dock but missed his slot and rammed into a telephone pole and the side of the boat of the guy next to his slot. We crashed. It was the climactic moment of last year’s Booze Crooze. A disappointing day that got worse.
So much has happened since last year’s forgettable boat ride into Hell. Whit no longer is allowed to park his boat in that same marina. Head has gotten more irritable. Wolfford’s knee is more mangled. And Whit’s replaced hip has popped out and back in again.
“My hip is slammed back in its socket and I’m ready to slalom water ski to show off my athleticism for all the fellas at this year’s Booze Crooze Boondoggle,” said Whit. “I’ve been inspired by the mission of the Baby Boomer Brotherhood that my best days and most important contributions to the world are in front of me. None of what I’ve been able to envision for this Booze Crooze would have been conceivable without the inspirational blogs of Sammy Swordfish.”
There will be a few new wrinkles for this year’s Crooze. Whit is not allowed to crash his boat into any telephone poles or other boats in the same marina.
Swordfish won’t be allowed to bring a 12-pack of Entenmann’s chocolate-covered donuts onto the boat because they melt and get brown stains all over the leather boat seats. And Rudy won’t be allowed to drink more than 25 orange crushes because, when he does, he has to leak overboard into the Bay too often which slows global warming. The heat of his urine (112 degrees Fahrenheit) warms the Bay, which heats the Earth.
“We’re going to lift Booze Crooze to a higher level of civility and class this summer,” said Swordfish. “No more sophomoric behavior will be tolerated.”
Everyone who has ever spent a day living in the state of Maryland, including Frank Chris Mullin Ryan, is invited to partake of Booze Crooze Fourz.
Whit’s power boat will leave the dock at 12 pm on July 23. First stop will be the tiki bars out in the middle of the bay where we’ll meet Blueberry Pie for a late lunch.
Sammy Sportface, a sports blogger, galvanizes, inspires, and amuses The Baby Boomer Brotherhood. And you can learn about his vision and join this group's Facebook page here:
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