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Sportface: Why The Home Run Record Got Shattered

Why the Home Run Record Got Shattered

The record for most home runs hit in one season by major league baseball players has been shattered in 2017.

The question is why? Why now? Why this year? Why not last year or ten years ago?

A few theories might explain this. It could be, for example, that more players are taking more steroids, making them stronger and able to generate more bat speed and power through the hitting zone. True, major league baseball enforces strict and random testing of all of its players and it has become quite a challenge to do roids without getting caught.

But maybe a bunch of players has figured out that if they take the latest, newfangled steroid that it won’t be detected in the tests. This new roid must really be something special; it cannot be found in the urine of the players and it helps them smack baseballs farther.

Another explanation could be that the baseball community did a study revealing that if more home runs get hit more people will go to the games and watch them on TV, thereby boosting advertising revenues. So the league created a way for the balls to fly further using some weight distribution and aerodynamic concepts that physics professors shared with them on the sly. Makes sense, doesn’t it? If you run a business and you want to boost revenues and profits, and your research tells you that more home runs will achieve that goal, then why wouldn’t you do whatever it took to ensure more home runs get hit even if that cheapens the sport for those purists who like the rules the way they are and the baseballs to be the same weight and size as when Satchel Page pitched 100 years ago.

This flurry of home runs could be happening for other reasons.  Like Popeye the Sailor Man, more players may be eating raw cans of spinach. As you will recall, when Popeye the TV hero gulped that spinach he would flex his arm muscle and it would look really strong and powerful. The spinach made him stronger so he could beat up the guy in the episode who had been antagonizing him.

Filled with raw spinach, the baseball players would immediately generate bigger bicep muscles, which of course would enable them to hit the ball farther, which of course means over the fences for more home runs. The only problem with this theory is that most, if not all, major league players were not born when Popeye starred on TV. To learn about this character and his spinach trick, these players would have had to do one of two things. First, they would have had to hear about Popeye from somebody and watch an episode all the way through to the end when he gulps the can of spinach. Or second, they could have just heard from another player that spinach expands your biceps and therefore helps you hit more dingers into the bleachers.

The only other plausible explanation for why the home run record was broken is that the pitchers are on the take. They have been purposely throwing fastballs down the middle of the plate because they are being paid by gamblers to do so. The deal they have made is to toss more meatballs to hitters in exchange for under-the-table financial payoffs.

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Sammy Sportface
Possibly America’s best sports blogger. Sometimes relevant and insightful. Often funny and satirical. Mostly mysterious and unpredictable. Only mildly interested in the truth.

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