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All I think about these days are AI agents and large language models and neural networks and transformers and back propagation and deep learning and reinforcement learning and supervised learning and unsupervised learning and Sam Altman and Ilya Sutskever and ChatGPT and Perplexity and Copilot and Grok and Caitlin Clark.
Her season opens May 3rd.
She’ll be on national TV 47 times this season because the WNBA has caught on that she’s the rainmaker who will make them all filthy rich, and they all want that. She’s got some new teammates, including Sophie Cunningham, who isn’t anything like Richie Cunningham, let me tell you.
I was thinking of seeing CC in person this season. Tickets go for $400 in the rafters. Maybe less if a home game in Indianapolis, which I am contemplating as a two-fer trip: Go see Caitlin, then drive over to French Lick, Indiana, and crash at the Larry Bird Hotel.
The WNBA tunnel treks will be more elaborate and more broadly watched than ever across all seven continents daily. CC will come out in the early games, sticking gliding-to-her-left step-back logo 3s, and we’ll wonder why no guys in the March Madness tournament can shoot nearly as well as she can.
Men aren’t better than women in every way, and this proves why.
She practices shooting much more than any of them. This gives her muscles memory benefits and myelin strengthening in her brain that enables her to make a higher percentage. It’s physiology.
The men’s March Madness tournament is a rinky dink brickfest we’re all just longing to get past so we can start zeroing in on CC who has been practicing her long range shooting and mid-range shot night and day fuming that the Olympic team last year said she wasn’t good enough to be on the team.
Once that news hit, she said, “They woke a monster.” This coming season, she’ll be monstering to prove to all of them she should have been on that team and is the best female basketball player in the world. Jealous WNBA players will whine and fret. Daily podcasters will post four videos a day with updates on every move CC makes on and off the court and all the backstabbing altercations from her opponents who can’t stand all the attention she gets that they want but don’t get.
She will prove she’s the top monster this season. Then we’ll all start wondering at what point we’ll anoint here the greatest female player who has ever lived.
Bring on the CC show. Put March Madness out of moribundness. What a brickfest boondoggle. More boring than standing in line at the DMV, as compelling as a piece of sheetrock, as uneventful as an afternoon in Siberia.
Without CC in March Madness, all we have is March Badness. None of those men can shoot like the incomparable CC. Caitlin Clark can make any shot at any park and even in the dark and on a lark.
I respect people who practice their crafts. I don’t respect people who are good athletes who get the NIL money and scholarships because of innate natural born quickness and agility, but are too lazy to put in the thousands of hours doing the drills to become skilled shooters, which is what basketball is all about. It’s harder to practice than to be born athletic. Respect the hard workers, not the natural athletes who can’t shoot.
Natural athleticism isn’t a basketball skill. It’s something you’re born with. Accurate shooting from long range takes countless of hours in the gym while no one’s watching. It gets boring and tedious, and you sometimes wonder if all the repetition is worth it, whether it will pay off. I know. I did this.
Some people aren’t willing to make those sacrifices. They aren’t mentally tough enough. They don’t want to be great so much that they’re willing to put in the hours all alone, shooting and shooting and shooting.
When May 3 comes around, Spring will have officially arrived. The tulips will be in bloom. We’ll all be wearing shorts and T-shirts. The sun will be out longer each day.
The oceans will part.
And Caitlin Clark will walk through.
Earth’s goddess.
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Sammy Sportface, a sports blogger, galvanizes, inspires, and amuses The Baby Boomer Brotherhood. And you can learn about his vision and join this group's Facebook page here:
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