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Dear John Williams –
I remember back in high school when we were closer friends than we are now, sitting around talking about our high school basketball battles, Gonzaga against St. John’s when you shifted the focus and decided you wanted to share a quote that moved you in one of your high school classes. You quoted Henry David Thoreau, the famous poet who drifted into the woods to think, who wrote these words:
“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them…It is a characteristic of wisdom not to do desperate things.”
Right then I knew you were different, a thinker, a man enamored with ideas beyond the superficial, not just a gym rat hooper without interests beyond ball. There you were, one of my basketball friends and opponents, bringing up ideas about living a life of quiet desperation.
At 17 years old you did the unusual and therefore memorable: brought up an awfully complex question, whether we are all desperate and being quiet about it, whether we would stay that way the rest of our lives. You were essentially asking: How should we live? Not how to play better hoops; how to architect a life.
I knew then I wanted to hear more of what you had to say. You weren’t all about hoops. You were a person contemplating why we are here and what we should do with our lives, asking if we could or should avoid living quiet lives of desperation. At least that’s how I interpreted it.
It was the first of many moments in high school, college, and beyond – right up until now — when I have thought about these issues. Self-examination, questioning of what this all means being a human being, was something important and stimulating.
To me, at least.
From there we became better friends, carousing around D.C. nightclubs, drinking Budweisers, playing hoops in front of hundreds of rabid fans, and talking. When you talked I wanted to know what you were thinking because it was usually something I benefited from hearing. I learned something or thought deeper. I liked being around you.
So long ago. Now we’re getting to be old men. I haven’t spoken with you in ten or more years and I sure would like to. What’s on your mind? What is your assessment of life now that you are filled up with plenty of it? Do you still think many men live quiet lives of desperation? Have you ever felt desperate?
I know one thing. You are relatively quiet. A man who says less than most, for sure, leading me and others wanting to know more of what’s on my mind.
Because you are special, John Williams. You stand apart for not needing to talk all the time. It’s admirable. I don’t know how you do it.
As you know I’m on this writing journey, exploring ideas every day, trying to figure out what I really think. What I really think about you is you are a person I want to talk to more. I miss our conversations.
I miss you.
This is not a desperate thing.
It’s an honest thing.
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Sammy Sportface, a sports blogger, galvanizes, inspires, and amuses The Baby Boomer Brotherhood. And you can learn about his vision and join this group's Facebook page here:
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