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A mouth as big as Texas. Teeth more lethal than Jaws. Royal blue and lime green tinted sunglasses hiding darting and pulsating eyes. A wolfman tornado of Ken Rogers hair around the time when his hit songs the street.
A laptop where he rests his fat free-flying fingers thinking up what to write today that no one has ever written before, or ever contemplated writing, something out there somewhere and yet right here right now. Pouring down on us like sheets of sleet.
A bowl crammed with chips for devouring in between sentences and semi-colons, a time for renewing inspiration while chewing with those to chomp eerie teeth knives that could slash sheetrock.
A can of stomach upsetting soda to wash down the chips. Some chips are spilled; who knows and who cares?
Tidy this cat ain’t.
Look at the dude rocking some baseball team’s jersey pretending to be a ballplayer as if typing on a keyboard requires fast switch muscles as if wearing a jersey will make him athletic again.
Other jerseys hang on his walls from random teams. Uniformity and common sense aren’t walking through his door.
Study, I beseech you, the disconcerting and outlandish expression on his face. He’s gleeful. He’s mischievous. He’s unpredictable and uncontrollable. He’s in his writing zone, a place no one wants to go to join him because it’s not anywhere familiar, not a place where anyone wants to be or ever will seek out.
Who is this guy you’re looking at in the picture, Wolfman Whackjob? The Typing Tornado? Coach Kluster Chips? Some washed-up athlete reliving his past glory days as a Planet of the Apes stuntman?
Figured it out yet?
You’re in the sacred presence of an AI-generated sports blogger creation, the one you check out every day to see what he’s up to, the one who, unsolicited, sends you text messages that wake you up in the morning and at night, and you keep telling Wolfman Willie to cut it out but he won’t because he lacks social intelligence and empathy. He’s inept at reading rooms.
Introducing Sammy Sportface, king of the Baby Boomer Brotherhood Blog, and Caitlin Clark fan club. Check out your pen pal, the creature who touches your soul shows you how to eat, and goes on and on about The Joker making a joke about the rest of the NBA players.
Sammy Sportface — this is he.
Let the Wolfman Whackjob be.
Author Profile
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Sammy Sportface, a sports blogger, galvanizes, inspires, and amuses The Baby Boomer Brotherhood. And you can learn about his vision and join this group's Facebook page here:
Sammy Sportface Has a Vision -- Check It Out
Sammy Sportface -- The Baby Boomer Brotherhood Blog -- Facebook Page
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