Jets Will Take Mayfield With Third Pick
Hot-headed, ostentatious, controversial, bloviating, bandana-wearing and talented Baker Mayfield is going to be a New York Jet, according to Sammy Sportface’s NFL inside sources.
The Jets Jets Jets will take the Oklahoma quarterback and Heisman Trophy winner with the number three pick in the upcoming NFL draft.
New York has been longing for a cocky and brash quarterback since Joe Willie Namath guaranteed the Jets would win Super Bowl III sitting on a lounge chair by a hotel pool outside a Miami hotel during Super Bowl week in 1967. Namath, who decades later kissed ESPN sideline reporter Suzy Kolber during an interview, delivered on that guarantee.
Namath was cocky and brash, a New York kind of guy. And so is Mayfield. So more than 50 years after that unforgettable Super Bowl victory, the Jets will have another play caller who will be charismatic, unpredictable, entertaining, and maybe even a good quarterback. But whether he’s good or not is immaterial; he will be entertaining and that’s what matters.
When Mayfield becomes a Jet, he will be daily theatre and juicy fodder for the New York tabloids. No telling what he might say, who he might offend, what body part he might grasp to gesture something at somebody or everybody. No telling what NFL opponent he might decide to offend by ramming a Jets flag into the center of their logo at the 50-yard line after beating them, sticking the dagger into their hearts.
This is going to be good.
Wouldn’t it be cool if, while Mayfield is getting interviewed by Suzy Kolber next season, he smooches her on the lips? And then Sammy Sportface launches a sports website called “Kissing Suzy Kolber on the Lips.”
Namath kissed her on the cheek, which launched the “Kissing Suzy Kolber” sports web site that gets 800 million more readers per day than NGSCSports.com.
When his name gets announced as the number three pick during the draft at the darkened auditorium in New York, Jets fans in attendance, wearing their gang green Joe Namath #12 jerseys, will stand up and boo as they have for every Jets draft pick since Namath.
During the event, there will be sheepishness among the media elite. ESPN NFL inside reporter Adam Schefter will be dismayed that Sammy Sportface scooped him by reporting that Mayfield would go to the Jets with the third pick when none of his hundred thousand sources would confirm this fact for him.
“I pride myself on breaking all NFL news before anyone else in the world,” said Schefter. “But I did not have the story nailed that Mayfield was going third to the Jets. Who is this Sammy Sportface guy? I can’t believe an unknown sports blogger broke this story before anyone else.”
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