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Today I got the munchies. Grabbed a bag of Cracker Jacks, or so I thought. Turns out I got a bag of Cracker Jill. Same caramel corn with peanuts. Just a different name.
The world is changing. Norms are being blown up. What’s next, Samantha Sportface? The Baby Boomer Sisterhood.
Equality envelopes vex us all. Should I change my name to Charlotte? Should I get my nails done?
What’s next, men wearing long gowns to work? Women putting on jockstraps?
Will Patrick Mahomes become Patricia Mahomes and announce she wants to play in the WNBA? Will Caitlin Clark go number one in next year’s NBA draft and change her name to Caden Clark?
How come there’s not an annual International Men’s Day but there is an International Women’s Day?
Is that fair? Doesn’t sound like equal rights to me.
Will boys play with Barbies and girls with GI Josies? Will children be born boys and decide to be girls and girls opt to be boys? What is a man? What is a woman? The lines have never been more blurred.
Is sexual stereotyping a thing of the past? Was it really so bad the way it was before? Is all this change really what we want? Is a she also a him and a her also a he? Only thing I know is this is pronoun madness.
Will men have throat surgery so their voices turn soprano? Will women become baritones? Is Madonna the same person as Mick Jagger except more manly? Should a song be made titled “Thank Heaven for Little Boys” because there’s already one called “Thank Heaven for Little Girls?” Should a law be passed that there must be a song called “California Boys” because one exists called “California Girls”?
Where does this end?
Are women always going to be better than men? In this period of change do men have any chance of becoming better than women or is that not part of the mission statement? Or have women already taken control of the entire world? And if so, why would any of them want to be a man? How come men are the also-rans of society? Is their gig over? Should it be? Do they deserve to be overtaken? Is this really what we want?
Will Caitlyn Jenner become a man and win the Olympic Decathlon? Will she win the Miss America Pageant? Will she be the first person to be a man, then a woman, then a man again? Would that be called the human trifecta?
All this is a lot to process mentally and emotionally. I long for simpler times when boys were boys and girls were girls, when complications weren’t ubiquitous when life didn’t make me feel as if I’m to blame for something.
I can’t even go do the simplest and most innocent of transactions, buy some Cracker Jacks, without feeling the world I live in now wants me and everything else to change. You want Cracker Jacks these days and you get Cracker Jill. The Cracker Jills tasted fine but I just wanted to munch not be reminded of the equal rights movement.
The world is feeling the internal combustion of a colossal paradigm shift. We’re at sea, thrashing about all ensconced in a different kind of sexual revolution where what we thought made sense is being questioned, where people are being radical.
What is it we are after? Equal rights? Fine, you can have them. I never said you couldn’t.
But this feels like the great unification, great separation, great division, and great perversion.
Do we really have to make life more complicated than it already is?
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Sammy Sportface, a sports blogger, galvanizes, inspires, and amuses The Baby Boomer Brotherhood. And you can learn about his vision and join this group's Facebook page here:
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About the Author
[…] while drawing Venn diagrams as part of my typical brainstorming before writing a Sammy Sportface blog, I was rudely interrupted – yet again – by the ferocious roar of four lawnmowers running […]
“Cracker Jill’. Promotion to celebrate ‘WOMEN’ is sports.
How does an entire marketing team fail to notice;
‘Jill’ has got nuts ???